.HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MY LITTLE DURIAN!.

Today we celebrated Taufiq's birthday with 5 boxes of regular Pizzas, along with all the other side meals that came along with the set 😀! And then later in the evening, we went to Mr.DIY. Originally the plan was to go to the arcade at Aeon but Sahey was feeling under the weather, so we postponed it to tomorrow..

Been a little busy reorganising my labels for this blog. I just noticed what a mess its been.

Oh and guess what, Shopee SPay Later CAN work at Mr.DIY. So In Syaa Allah, it can work for LOTUS as well, In Syaa Allah.. Another alternative instead of credit card, hehe.

Update: 

Taufiq got eye infection just now. Just booked clinic appointment for him tomorrow morning..

.Someday, I Hope You Read This.

You know..

Someday,
I will tell Abang that when he was a little boy, I was always tough on him because I didnt want him to be weak when I'm gone someday. I need him to be strong and to always keep the family strong together, protected and happy. I want him to handle stress and pressure as friends alongside with fun and calm.

Someday,
I will tell Adek that when she was a little girl, she used to get a lot of yelling and smacking from me.. All because she would start her tantrum first (out of the blue) and theeennn she would state her reason.. And because I want her to be strong so that no one can boss her around just cause she's small or a girl. And that crying or begging is NOT an option.

Someday,
I will tell Baby that when he was a little boy, I didn't pampered him enough as the youngest.. He got the same treatment as Abang and Adek, starting at the age of 1. I want him to know that no matter what age you are, the love you get, the burden you carry and the punishment you get, is just as equal as your elders. They went through the same starting at 1..

Ya Allah, keep my family strong and together. Bless us with love, happiness, respect and with strong bonds no matter what you throw at us.. Aamiin..

.Beautiful Waxed Thread!.

Alhamdulillah my MOST awaited parcel just arrived safely!!! CANTEK KN THE COLOURS! And I am definitely gonna buy more in the near future!!!

Look who’s got their new school shoes .. They were so excited lol! Akid on the other hand, will only have me as his friend when Abg and Adek are at school til noon hehe.

Can’t wait for the teacher’s call to pick up their school uniforms!

Mom and dad said they wanna be there on the kids first day at school .. InsyaAllah bole aje .. Semoga Allah swt mudahkan segalan urusan persekolahan anak2 aku.. Aamiin..

.Postponed Goals, 50% Accomplised.

It has already been 5 days since the kids started potty training.

The first day was tough as hell. For me and the kids. They got scolded and butt-smacked each time they peed on the floor. Specially Adra. Cause she peed every 2 – 3 minutes!!!! I had to mop the floor every 2 – 3 minutes! HAND MOP!

I thought they’d never learn but Alhamdulillah, the next day, I was surprised when Adra asked for the toilet when she had to pee! Although it was every 2 – 3 minutes, I didn’t mind, as long as she’s asking for the toilet. I know she’s still learning to control and predict when the pee is coming.

Abg on the other hand, still wets the floor sometimes cause he’s too lazy to speak! So yea, he’s still getting the butt-smacking and scolding.

My target is 1 month.

First week : Day potty training

Second week : Night potty training

Third week : Outing potty training

Forth week : All goals achieved

I want to get them ready before kindergarten starts which is January next year! And yes, they do teach potty training there but I want them to be prepared in advance cause they’re already late.

Like mom said, it’ll be few months of hell when potty training your kids. I certainly know that now! But Alhamdulilah, Allah swt helped out ALOT. They learned really fast and Allah swt lent me strength and patience. To me, only the first day was hard and trouble. From then on, its just smooth and easy. No chest attacks .

________________________________

Moving on ~~~~~~

Alhamdulillah, we have found a suitable kindergarten for both abg and adek .

Very near.

The kindergarten branch at Taman Perling was closed this year due to renovation but will be opened next year 2018. So for now as the teacher said, there’s only 6 kids for 5 yo class and no kid for 4 yo class. Just enough kids for abg to socialize and focus in class and less bad influence from other kids. Adra on the other hand, I am not worried much InsyaAllah cause she can always see her brother from just across her classroom.

I hope this strong love magnet that I am having towards this kindergarten will do my kids future education bright and excellence . Aamiin..

A little expensive but InsyaAllah its within our budget. Aamiin..

Will proceed with payment before 1st December this year.

________________________________

Dang I got so much to think about.

I’ve almost accomplished alot of last years postponed goals just this mid November. Giving myself credit and I’m proud of myself. . Alhamdulillah, all thanks to Allah swt for making things possible. Aamiin..

.Happy Birthday Loves.

Yesterday celebrated 3 birthday darlings of mine..

9th Sept : Baba
10th Sept : Adra
25th Sept : Taufiq

Bought Secret Recipe's Oreo Cheesecake and went to Jusco for Grand Canyon Cafe and Arcade.. And of course, abg and adek's birthday present haha..

Adra got herself an ABC laptop and abg got himself a police station set. Baba still havent told me what he wants..

Had a really good day and Alhamdulillah, thank you Allah swt for the extra rezqi you've granted us :').. Alhamdulillah...

.Half of The Story.

When I first became a mum, it wasnt easy. Specially when Abg cried most of his infant days. And my anger was still uncontrollable and unmanageable.

I would scream at him when he refuses to sleep :'(.. I only cared about myself. I would put him on the cot and deafened myself pretending he wasnt there. But when his cries got too loud to be ignored, I yelled at him til he was quite for a while and then fell asleep. I would curse, cry, begged for him to sleep. When I cry during my doa, Abg would be in silence. It was like he knew I was tired and I needed the rest. But it wasnt like this everyday.

There wasnt a day go by that I would imagine throwing him on the walls so that he would shut up. Or put a pillow on his face and suffocate him to death I imagine blood spattered everywhere. Let me tell you something, everytime I cursed and yelled at him, he would look at me with fear. Those feared eyes of his reminded me of how I looked at dad. I dont want him to go through the same thing I did. I want my kids to be open with me. No matter the situation.

My daily fear was being left alone with Abg. I was afraid of hurting him. But Alhamdulillah, til this day I managed to control my actions, but fail to control my words and tone.

When I cant control Abg's cries, I would mock the satans for disturbing my baby. Why? Cause most of the time Abg would look at one specific place or corner and cry hysterically. I would go to that spot, point my middle finger and tell whatever is there, to fuck off and find else where to show off them ugly bitching faces!! And abg would be calm again.

I recorded most of abg's infant days so that I can watch it back and know which part of me that needs fixing so that it wont effect mother son relationship. Those days were horrible. I regretted every word.

Abg still cries now. But he's almost 3 years old and I've learned to appreciate him most. And he is a fast learner and very understanding. When he sees me crying, he would hug me and gently tap my back :').

Now, Every time he sleeps, I would not miss my chance to kiss him and whisper to him how much I love him and his baby sister and how sorry I am for mistreating him when he was a baby. I try not to yell at him when he makes mistakes. Yes sometimes it slips but I never delay my apologies.

Abg never got the chance to breastfeed as long as adik. His only lasted for 2 month after finding out I was pregnant with Adra. I dont want him to feel and be distance from me. Cause I'm the eldest, like him, I took alot of beating growing up. I dont want him to go through most the beating the way I did. And I dont want Adra to disrespect him as the eldest like how my siblings are towards me. It hurts. And it brings you down and thickens your walls and raises your guard. Even to families.

Adra on the other hand is less hassle. Grows up beautifully Alhamdulillah . . And I will make sure Abg takes good care of her. She is feisty but she is gonna need it growing up in a selfish society.

I learned alot growing up just by observing how the family behaves towards one another. I just hope it doesnt overshadows my way of disciplining and building my own family.

.Ramadhan.

Another 2 more weeks of Ramadhan . . Feels like we just started it few days ago :( . . Alhamdulillah so far, I only missed a day due to nursing . .

Dont care much about my baju Raya but still searching for the kids Baju Raya . . Aimed few at Danga Mall :) . .

I havent done much deed this Ramadhan but I can tell you that InsyaAllah this Ramadhan is better than my previous Ramadhan :) . .

Parents came to JB few days ago to take noni back to Subang . . Slept here for a day and now missing them alot :) . . Alhamdulillah my parents are blessed with strong and good health condition . .

Abg sure missed his Atuk alot lol . . He straight away headed to Camry's driver door as soon as dad parked his car . . And he was just so excited all the while my parents were here . . And when my parents left, he was crying in silent . . Haihhh . . Sabar ye abg . . Mama pn slalu rindu atuk and nenek . . It can get quite lonely here at home :( . . Wish I could play around with the kids more but most of the time I get too tired after all the house chores and cooking :( . . Mama mntk maaf mama xdpt nk layan abg ngan adek 24jam :( . .

Mama sayang sgt both of you :) . . You're my life, my joy, my heavan, my everything . . *not very good with words and emotions lol* . . I'll always make sure that I do and give everything I can to keep you both happy, safe, and successful dunia dan akhirat InsyaAllah . . :)

.Taufiq's Jealousy Cost Him A Big Painful Bump.

Like the post title said, I was breastfeeding Adra and he got jealous cause I wasnt paying attention to him and he tripped and fell hard on a hanger on the floor :'(.. I can imagine how painful it hurts by the way he rolled and cried on the floor :'(.. Stopped Adra for a minute to sooth him down and then Adra fell asleep like a big girl :)..

Praying that his bump is nothing serious :'(.. Aamiin aamiin aamiin...

.Hello.

Alhamdulillah, Taufiq is all well and Adra almost :).. Sahey..? He just started lol.. Me..? Feels like fever back again -.-..

Johor's been raining heavily lately :).. Heaven for me but unfortunately for those bikers going to work specially to Singapore.. Refering to my husband. Lol..

Another few more days and Adra is Alhamdulillah 2 months old :).. Cannot wait til you turn 6 months baby :)..

New exciting things just round the corner:
1. Taufiq screwed the TV dead and so Sahey's buying a new one this week..
2. Billa's engagement this month and her wedding insyaAllah early next year..

Thats all :)..

.Unwell.

Last night was the first time I'm taking care of Taufiq and Adra alone and Ya Allah... stress sangat2..

Not stress because they are kids but because they're both unwell and both of them couldnt sleep and I didnt know what to do cause it was past midnight and plus, I was so tired that their screaming cries didnt bother me at all :(.. Alhamdulillah at 6am, I got my strength back and my stable mood..

Kecian Taufiq 2 kali jatuh katil :'(..

Dah. I need rest.

.Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri 2014.

Yes, I know its a little too late to wish Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri, but I'll wish it anyways :)..

First til forth Raya at Terengganu and then the rest at Subang :).. Mom and dad's open house was a success Alhamdulillah but sad cause I didnt have time to talk to Ziela :'(.. Guilty sgt and I am really sorry for not being able to entertain you cause Sahey's cousin was around :(.. I will make it up to you InsyaAllah before I head back to JB :)..

Anyways, Taufiq received alot of duet Raya Alhamdulillah and so did Adik :).. Will open up Tabung Haji once I have his original birth certificate in my hands..

Raya pictures of Sahey me Taufiq and Adik (inside mama's big belly) :D..

.Taufiq's 8 Month Achievements.

So a lot of good things happened after Taufiq turned 8 months old :).. Achievements after achievements. Though not big ones, but yea, baby steps la dlu kn..

1. Taufiq has got 2 tooth out on the lower jaw and another 1 on its way on the upper jaw.
2. He can sit straight :)..
3. He manage to stand by himself..
4. He's climbing and reaching for higher things :)
5. He made 1 step forward without holding on to anything..
6. He's eating varieties of foods! Adult foods!
7. He can now sleep without a spring cot!
8. Getting smarter and knows how to interact so people gets him!
9. He knows what 'clapping' is and he claps when you say the word :')..
10. He's learning fast :)..

The only thing he's skipping is crawling.. He's suppose to, crawl > sit > stand > walk , if I am not mistaken.. He's still depending on his belly to move around lol.. Xpe, InsyaAllah xlama bole la tu merangkak :)..

Busy busy me ever since I stayed in Subang :(.. Specially with no transport and no one there for me on weekdays, just makes it harder to move around independently :(.. Nk xnk, esok KNE jugak g check up baby #2.. I'm already weeks late!! :(.. Sure kne marah ngan nurse :(...

.Random #???.

Yesterday our electric box thingy that we all have on our walls, EXPLODED, due to overload use of electricity. Happened in the middle of me shaving Taufiq head -.-. Then blackout from 12pm to 7pm.

Gile x gile but it was hot and so me and Taufiq drive thru McDonalds and ate in the car. 1 hour later I was gonna book a hotel but Alhamdulillah, sayang called Zul besar and he said he'd come around 6 something pm.

Naseb baek it wasnt out electricity got cut off by TNB.. Naseb baek it just exploded. So wiring didnt took long :).. Kecian syg had to leave work an hour early :(..

And so, Taufiq is now bald for the second time.. So neat ^^ HAHAH...

.Smile..Life's Treating You Kind.

Ayah got warded again yesterday for his second treatment.. InsyaAllah all is well, Aamiin aamiin aamiin.. May Allah swt lift all his pain away and bless ayah with strength and good health.. I hope this time ayah learnt his lesson about taking good healthy foods at the right amount of quantity.. Hmmm... Kami semua sayang ayah...

Haihhh, time flies by fast! Taufiq is gonna turn 8 months old just round the corner and few months more, he'll be 1 years old :).. Which means, he, I mean we, will be welcoming another new member in the family, InsyaAllah, Taufiq's baby brother/sister... Aamiin aamiin aamiin..

Semoga Allah swt ease my delivery and save me and my newborn's life no matter what the complications will be.. Aamiin aamiin aamiin..

I am just praying my previous C-Section wont cause any internal or external damage on me :(.. Aamiin aamiin aamiin...

Looking forward to meet the family and best friends this end of May, InsyaAllah, Aamiin aamiin aamiin...

.Flashback.

Not really one of those nostalgic flashback.

Taufiq cried and screamed in anger from 2 to 4 pm. Like being possessed or something. He kicked me. He throwed his hands at me. And rebelled.

Somehow, reminded me of me, losing self control in my room trying to let all the angers out.

I swear if Taufiq had super strength, he'd throw his baby cot at me. :(...

So I just let him cry and scream his heart out cause I am no good at calming someone specially with these little patience of mine. Few minutes after the dramatic thing going on, I gave him some porridge and he slowly stopped crying.

Ok. I need a rest.

.7 Month Old.

Alhamdulillah.. My little baby turns 7 month old today :)...

And for the second time, celebrated at Secret Recipe, Jusco Tebrau.. He had his instant porridge cause there were no porridge in the menu.. :(.. Sorry ea sayang mama..

Daddy bought him a Converse sneaker.. He's not even crawling yet lol -.-'...

And mummy bought him a bedding cot 7 in 1 set :)... I love seeing the whole set concept thingy for a cot hehe...

2 sad thing happened today..

Taufiq fell in the toilet in his walker :'(.. Traumatized both me and Taufiq and I cried the most.. Alhamdulillah sgt there's no injury.. Hopefully same goes with his insides.. Aamiin aamiin aamiin.. Ya Allah, jauhkan la anak anak aku dari kemalangan, and kesakitan, and kecelakaan.. Aamiin aamiin aamiin..

And then the news dad got warded due to blood blockage causing the heart attack he had yesterday and today :'(.. The moment I got that phone call, I couldnt stop worrying and Alhamdulillah, the doctor said dad seems better. But just incase it happens again, its surgery for dad.. InsyaAllah, Allah swt sentiasa plan yg terbaik untuk ayah.. Aamiin aamiin aamiin.. Get well soon ayah.. We all love you :')..

And thats for today..

Assalamualaikum :)..

.Fever.

Since the whole house is down with fever, haihhh, ape lg.. First my baby's temperature went high and he went down with cold, now I'm down with cold as well.

My whole body is freezing and the fan is not even on!

But Alhamdulillah Taufiq is getting better after that pill up in his ass! Mke selamba saja... Haha... More active than this morning too.. :).. I love you baby...!

Rindu kt sayang saya :(.. Gaduh besar 2 days ago and I cant find the mood to start a conversation yet cause it was his fault.

Semoga Allah s.w.t. sentiasa lindungi and jaga suami aku, murahkan, lapangkan and dekatkan rezeki die, hapuskan hutang2 die and sentiasa berkati hidup amalan and ilmu die :').. Aamiin... Begitu juga dengan keluarga, keturunan and kawan2 kami... Semoga kau ampunkan dosa-dosa kami Ya Allah Ya Tuhan kami..

Aamiin aamiin aamiin... :)..

.Sleeping Taufiq.

I am in love with all the grown up positions of Taufiq sleeping lol...

.My Little Family.

Hehe.. This is the first picture of our family snapped together.. And as you can see, Taufiq is a natural hahah.. He knows exactly where to look and when to look.

Seriously, whenever he looks at himself in the mirror or in a video, he'll get super excited and starts kicking his legs and reaching out his hands to touch his own face and communicate lol.. Must have thought there's a real living baby behind the screen lol..

Pape pn, mama and ayah loves you so much baby...

*think its time I change my blog's main picture to this one :)*

.Step By Step.

Hihi.. My little baby is slowly growing up and mama is loving every step by step development progress you're making :).. I see you're trying to communicate although I dont understand you :)..

Cepat besar k Taufiq.. And we'll travel with Ayah :) , InsyaAllah :)