.Our Telekung Arrived.

Alhamdulillah.. Telekung ibu anak arrived safely yesterday! I thought it’ll never arrive cause it took forever and there was no update online. And now, Adra doesn’t need to wear my tudung instant as her telekung .

And then there’s me and the love of my life .

Although he’s been doing a lot of OTs, we had a very well time spent together with the kids .

I love you A.S.A ..!

.Loius Le Petite Lightweight Stroller by Alpha Living.

Its late. But Afiq is not back home yet so I’ll just stay awake until he’s back.

I went to my bookbinding Idol’s page and MasyaAllah I am just so amazed by her work .. She’s in the USA and I told her if she’s ever coming to Malaysia, I hope she’d give me a private workshop to help me improve myself. She’s so humble :’)..

Anyway, the stroller arrived!

Louis Le Petit Lightweight Stroller by Alpha Living

Honest review :

1. It is lightweight as in I can carry it with just one hand holding the folded stroller and the other hand opening the bonet. If you have to know, my bonet’s spring is broken, so you can imagine the heavy weight I’m holding on one hand.
2. The wheels are just smooth and manoeuvrable! It gave me no trouble going back and forth, left and right.
3. Compact? I was a little disappointed with this one. I thought it was small. Small as in I can fit it in a shopping bag or garbage plastic bag. But no. Its flat. But wide. Pfft! So much for compact.
4. I love the fabric. The colour. And the height of the stroller seat!
5. The shopping basket is normal size. They say large capacity but its only standard size.

Akid is getting use to the new stroller cause the seat of his previous stroller was pretty low. And he doesn’t like the handle bar, but he’s gonna have to get use to that one too. So yea, all is good .

.Al-Azhar Kindergarten.

InsyaAllah as far as budget goes, this will InsyaAllah be abg and adek’s kindergarten..

Strong love magnet towards this one. Don’t know why but something puts me at ease every time I  see this kindergarten. I am gonna trust my mother instinct and pray to Allah swt that InsyaAllah this is the best for my kids .. Aamiin.. And plus I love the teacher that I met for registration fee interview .

InsyaAllah.

.Pain Pain Go Away.

This whole chest pain and increase of Gram in pain killer is getting a little too serious.

I’m taking 2 pain killers in one time now. Usually the pain killer would make me drowsy and then I’d sleep. But this time, it doesn’t. Even when I took 2 pills!

I just cant afford the pain at this stage of life. Abg and Adra needs me now more than ever. I cant let pain slow me down.

Yesterday went shopping at Jusco Taman U. And bought this romper for Akid, Aim and Umaar.. Bole pulak lpe nk beli tuk Tariq, Mimi’s newborn!!! Xpe, next time pergi Jusco can buy for Tariq..

I just love babies . Specially when they are family.. Next time shop for baby clothing. kne beli 7 baju together. But only when its on sale . Taufiq. Adra, Akid, Numan, Nuaim, Umaar and Tariq.

.Postponed Goals, 50% Accomplised.

It has already been 5 days since the kids started potty training.

The first day was tough as hell. For me and the kids. They got scolded and butt-smacked each time they peed on the floor. Specially Adra. Cause she peed every 2 – 3 minutes!!!! I had to mop the floor every 2 – 3 minutes! HAND MOP!

I thought they’d never learn but Alhamdulillah, the next day, I was surprised when Adra asked for the toilet when she had to pee! Although it was every 2 – 3 minutes, I didn’t mind, as long as she’s asking for the toilet. I know she’s still learning to control and predict when the pee is coming.

Abg on the other hand, still wets the floor sometimes cause he’s too lazy to speak! So yea, he’s still getting the butt-smacking and scolding.

My target is 1 month.

First week : Day potty training

Second week : Night potty training

Third week : Outing potty training

Forth week : All goals achieved

I want to get them ready before kindergarten starts which is January next year! And yes, they do teach potty training there but I want them to be prepared in advance cause they’re already late.

Like mom said, it’ll be few months of hell when potty training your kids. I certainly know that now! But Alhamdulilah, Allah swt helped out ALOT. They learned really fast and Allah swt lent me strength and patience. To me, only the first day was hard and trouble. From then on, its just smooth and easy. No chest attacks .

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Moving on ~~~~~~

Alhamdulillah, we have found a suitable kindergarten for both abg and adek .

Very near.

The kindergarten branch at Taman Perling was closed this year due to renovation but will be opened next year 2018. So for now as the teacher said, there’s only 6 kids for 5 yo class and no kid for 4 yo class. Just enough kids for abg to socialize and focus in class and less bad influence from other kids. Adra on the other hand, I am not worried much InsyaAllah cause she can always see her brother from just across her classroom.

I hope this strong love magnet that I am having towards this kindergarten will do my kids future education bright and excellence . Aamiin..

A little expensive but InsyaAllah its within our budget. Aamiin..

Will proceed with payment before 1st December this year.

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Dang I got so much to think about.

I’ve almost accomplished alot of last years postponed goals just this mid November. Giving myself credit and I’m proud of myself. . Alhamdulillah, all thanks to Allah swt for making things possible. Aamiin..

.People Like You and Me.

Kadang2 it saddens me.

I am more of my father. He’s been my idol for so long despite his tempers and harsh words. Tough love. Him from his father, and me from my father. But there’s good in him. And somehow I have been observing and criticizing his bad side for too long, that it affected me. And hurting the people I love most.

I wish I could tell my hubby and my kids and Afiq to not let my words get through to their heart. They keep telling me to change myself. Truth is, I have tried so hard. I took their advice, I kept myself away, I kept words to myself, I tried it all. But the more I control, the more I contain myself, the bigger the blow,  when one small thing triggers that wrong side of my feeling at the wrong time.

With people like me and ayah, everyone needs to build sound proof walls around them. But even so, judging from my experience, no matter how thick and how good those sound proof walls are, you still get hurt. Cause you try to tell something to their face, the truth maybe, but they can’t hear you. Cause all they hear is themselves. That’s what our father daughter relationship is like. And ever since I have my own family, my own home, I’ve become the problem. And everyone’s either afraid to talk to me, or making distance away from me. And life starts to get lonely even when you tell yourself you’re gonna make this right tomorrow. But deep down, you know that you’re too close to too late.

It hurts. It really hurts.

People like me and dad, we think we have got it all figured out what’s best for everyone, but we forget to ask those people’s opinion when we made decisions that was suppose to be theirs. Cause people like me and dad, we’re afraid to watch others fail and regret later in life.

Atleast dad’s a better and successful loser than I am .

I only pray that who I am, better not screw up my marriage and my kids life. Aamiin..

.Not Cut Out For This.

Few orders from 11.11 sale is already on its way here from China .

Alhamdulillah.

Just few items that still record not updated yet online. Slow work lagi2 when its from China.

I am thinking of going back to Subang. I really cannot do this whole potty train alone. Specially when I cannot do heavy work anymore . But to live in Subang for 3 months, means dealing with stairs, dealing with mom and dad’s house rules, dealing with other peoples mess, dealing with 2 storey house chores and so much more! Memang lg penat aku gtau ko.

Dammit this is so tiring!

If I don’t do this now, when? Next year they will be in school already. Pening la kepala when only one side is doing all the hard work! Its both of us pny responsibility as a parent do you know that??

Enough for now.

My baby needs me.

.Potty Train Lah Sangat~.

Penat sangat today..

I am suppose to potty train Taufiq and Adra today but I am already so tired and its not even half day yet. Sahey is not giving me the help I need!

So right now they are wearing pampers back. But I am gonna take it off right after I have this sleep I am gonna take right now.

Ya Allah, mudahkan urusan aku tuk kebaikkan anak2 aku.

I am weak!

Sigh.

.He's Back. Alhamdulillah.

So Sahey's big surprise for me and the family finally arrived. It was HP ProOne 400 PC :).

Now I have a laptop and a PC! So the old PC, I am gonna send it for fixing and I am gonna give em to my sister. I think she needs it more than me needing the money after selling it away.

So I tried to make a book of my life. Like what dad is doing since forever. Guess what.
Turns out I suck in writing! Baru 1 muka surat and I deleted the whole thing. I feels like such a waste of time. I mean who wants to read about other people's life? Not me. And I doubt anyone would be interested to read it either.

I like doing assignments and work stuff. Cause there's a purpose and goal to it.
But writing about myself?? And my life?
I don't see the point. Keeping it to myself is a better option.

Afiq is back home.
Alhamdulillah.

After the big fight, I had this long deep thought to myself and I find myself realizing that I am not the kinda sister who have the heart to abandon my own siblings. Its just not me. I have been looking out for them since forever, I wont make an irrational decision to dump them now. I'm glad I had that conversation with myself as I cleaned his room and folded his shirts. I cant yell at someone to change to the better. I learned that there are more ways to do that. Even if it means being patient and being the example of who you want them to be.

I lack patience. Maybe this is how Allah swt wants to teach me.
By accepting other peoples flaw.
I was never good at that too. Specially the weak ones. Allah.

Enough.

I am just glad Afiq is where I am able to protect him.

Alhamdulillah.

.Damn You 11.11 SALE!.

I spent RM1k ++ on 11.11 sale. Lazada, 11Street and Aliexpress.

Ya Allah. Semoga selamat sume parcel2 ku sampai ke rumah.. Aamiin..

Overspent but its for good cause. Bkn beli barang saje2 je kali ni mcm handbag or shoes or lipstick and shits.

Gementar nk menunggu.

Selamat Malam

.Shopping List.

Thanks 11.11 Sale..

I spent almost RM1K on notebook tools and bookbinding stuffs. I hope it arrives safely to me.. InsyaAllah, Aamiin..

And then my fingers gatal sgt went searching for clothing online tp naseb baek I didnt make any purchase! I was already half way in completing my check out! Hai engkau nafsu!!

Mentang2 la duet ade ko laju je nk beli bnd yg x penting..

Others that still needs to be bought:
1. Printer G2000
2. E6230 Chassis palmrest/touchpad replacement
3. 1TB hard drive for laptop
4. Leather leather and leather!

.Wedding Door Gift.

Alhamdulillah.
Finally bought myself a secondhand Dell notebook after my old PC died.

I had this idea of making door gift goods for Afiq or Syikin's wedding XD.

A small leather notebook and a wooden pen, wrapped in recycled paper and a ribbon. With a THANK YOU note for attending their wedding...
What do you think?

And no, I am not saying they are getting married anytime soon.
Just an idea. A thought. A way to kill time and practice.

:)

.Another 1 Year.

Alhamdulillah..

Problem with Afiq is settled.
He's moving back into my house..
I just cant bare to know mom and dad are paying for another rental house just for him. That would mean, double of all utility bills. Belom lg furniture.
Cant. Burden my mom with financial problems at that age.

I'll keep myself together for another year.
InsyaAllah.
Aamiin..

.Mom's Healing.

InsyaAllah tomorrow will be going back to Subang Jaya.

Mom finally replied my text. She just needed some time to heal from all this sibling mess.

Told her that my family will be staying at USJ9 hotel (since Afiq keje mengungkit), and she insisted we stay at Subang but no way can I look at Afiq's face for 1 whole day. And tomorrow too we will be discussing about Afiq moving into my house again. I made that offer only for ibu's sake. She doesnt deserve anymore financial burden at this age.

And so thats all for now.

Adra's curcumcision on the 4th November at 2.30pm..
Wuh! Your mama's nervous for you syg..
Semoga Allah swt mudahkan urusan kamu Adra.. Aamiin..